Why You Might Be Sabotaging Your Career Change—And What to Do About It

There you are, sitting at your desk in the middle of the afternoon.

You’ve started taking a few tentative steps to make a change in your career. You’ve picked up a couple of new skills through courses. You chat regularly with a friend who’s in the field you’re wanting to get into. A mentor has come alongside you for guidance and support.

The long-overdue shift you’ve been yearning to make is starting to happen, a new version of you is starting to come to the surface.

Everything is going so well for you as you travel down this new path.

And then, the doubt starts. Why am I doing this? Will my friends still like me if I make this move? Who am I to make such a big change in my life?

And then you slow down. The calls to your mentor stop. Your coursework isn’t as sharp. And you stop talking with your friend about your coming change.

You stay stuck where you are. And back to going through the motions that made you want to change your career in the first place.

When we are on the edge of making a major change in our lives, it can feel exciting. And then, it can feel scary. And that scariness, that “Oh my goodness, this is crazy, I have to slow down” keeps us from moving forward to the place—the career—we truly want to be.

Self-sabotage is a thing. You might be harming your progress and not even know it. What steps can you take to make sure you see what’s happening, and still move ahead with your goal?

Fear sometimes has a funny way of showing up when we’re close to something meaningful. Just when it feels like you’re gaining momentum, fear shows up and whispers, “This is too much.” And too often, we listen to that whisper. We slow down. We back away. We do it not because we’re lazy or unmotivated, but because we’re wired to seek safety.

And let’s be honest: change doesn’t feel safe.

Here’s another way to look at it: What if fear wasn’t a red flag, but instead, a green light? A sign that you’re moving toward something that matters?
The presence of fear doesn’t mean the path is wrong. It means the path is real.

There’s always a part of us that wants to go back to what feels safe. That part isn’t bad. It just needs reassurance that you’re going to be okay. That you’re not leaping without a parachute. That you’re actually building something stronger.

What about that moment when you stop calling your mentor? When you close your laptop instead of logging into your course? That’s not failure. That’s a scared part of you trying to protect what you’ve built so far.
But protection isn’t the same as alignment.

Change is not a one-and-done event—it’s a relationship. And like all relationships, it needs tending, care, and reconnection. So if you’ve drifted from your goal lately, that’s okay. You can always return.

So, how do we move forward when fear wants us to stay put?

• Start small. You don’t have to sprint right out of the blocks. Just take the next step: a check-in text, a 10-minute lesson, even a walk while thinking about your next question.

• Talk back to the fear. Yes, literally. “Hey, I see you. I know you’re trying to keep me safe. But I’ve got this.” This helps you acknowledge what you’re feeling.

• Anchor to evidence. Take a look back at what you’ve already done. You didn’t imagine those wins; you earned them. Let them remind you of what you’re capable of doing.

• Get support. The work you’re doing isn’t solo work. Change asks for community. Find a coach, a friend, a group that reminds you who you are when your confidence wavers.

At the end of the day, you don’t need to get rid of the fear you feel. You just need to keep it from driving the car.

Here’s what I want you to know: the version of you that made it this far didn’t show up just to stay stuck.

It showed up to grow into your next chapter.

I’m Richard Taliaferro. I’m a certified career coach specializing in helping mid-stage professionals gain clarity on their career journey. I’ve written a guide on how to escape the work hamster wheel. Click here to download yours.